Saying Goodbye to Yesterday

This week was a very interesting week in that I feel like I’ve turned into the Angry Black Woman. Don’t worry, it’s not PMS boys. But, honestly I have been trying to savage a relationship that I think is bound to end unless there are deep fundamental changes. If we lived together I would be screaming for change in the house- and not the same old politics. I know I said the used to be male hated word change, but it’s about time that I set the record straight. This word was a feminist movement before Obama picked it up and ran with it like a Kenyan in a marathon. I do want men to change; not in this lovey dubey love everything that walks kind of way, but in understanding that the world has evolved into a coexisting space for both sexes. I have become very independent since I left college and I think it is ridiculous to think that the 21st century woman should be staying at home slouched over and pregnant with three maniacs screaming about in the background. I’m here to say those days are over! We are fierce and rational, and independent. For crying out loud some of us are heading the households. But as a feminist I have a few things working against me, yes this is beside the obvious sexist macho movement that wants to keep my sisters down. For one I am African- Kenyan actually, and hopefully this will excuse my Obama stance earlier, not that I have any form of self hate that I feel necessary to interject. But, I have only dated black men and a lot of them tend to live in this bubble of what a black woman should be. How a black woman should act, what a black woman should eat, where a black woman should go… I think you get the picture. Lets not forget the infamous how a black woman should talk. This is not to say that you can’t put lipstick on a pig, but I often find that such sexism spills over subtly like an over the top tap of beer. It is sometimes menacing in the air like thick smoke waiting to be let out of a burning building, and damn it I’m letting it out! I’m letting it out!

Men need to understand that most women want someone who they can walk with; not walk over or in front of, or be dawdled with for years. This is the basis of trust, but then again I may just be an Angry Black Woman.

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